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April 15, 2004 12:01 AM

Broken: Square Toilet

Marc Rettig writes:

Here is a picture of the toilet in my London hotel. The toilet is square. My butt, like most, is round. In the presence of so many alternative designs that provide a better experience, this is a backwards innovation into brokeness.


That is fucked up. Honestly! I'd fall in!

Posted by: What the... at April 15, 2004 01:23 PM

That has to be the worst design I have ever seen. Even triangluar would be better.

Posted by: Mark Millard at April 15, 2004 04:07 PM

Ain't you heard? The Brits are squarebums.

Bass ackwards, indeed.

Posted by: Zarate at April 16, 2004 01:38 PM

Next thing you know they're going to have rectangular chairs.

Posted by: mendel at April 16, 2004 04:48 PM

This didn't seem that broken to me. As a previous poster indicated, chairs are rectangular and we sit on those without much issue.

Posted by: noname at April 16, 2004 04:57 PM

It's kind of hard to tell the scale of the picture, but the hole looks larger than those of most oval toilets. So it looks like you're only being supported at the very edges of your butt at four contact points, which wouldn't be all that comfortable. The comparison to rectangular chairs doesn't fit because with round chairs and with rectangular chairs, you're sitting right on the center and not on the edges, so the shape doesn't matter. The hole in a toilet seat only needs to be big enough to let through what's supposed to be let through without having it hit the sides. This toilet may be good for people who like to pee without lifting the seat, but not for prolonged sitting.

Posted by: RotJ at April 17, 2004 01:03 AM

for a woman, this would be very uncomfortable. your butt would touch the seat on both sides, it looks like, but then there would be an open space behind and in front of you. it really would feel like i was about to fall in.

Posted by: margaret at April 18, 2004 02:08 PM

Do they have little round doilies of toilet paper?

Posted by: tim at April 20, 2004 11:03 AM

Everyone needs a square crapper. It adds a little class to something that is not classy.

Posted by: Ryan at April 26, 2004 09:55 PM

I'm looking for a seat for my square toilet. Anybody got any ideas?

Posted by: don jacobs at August 6, 2004 06:53 PM


Posted by: TimB at September 8, 2004 10:06 PM

i grew up with one of these. it was comfortable. it was pink

Posted by: gina at October 24, 2004 04:10 PM

this will work perfect for me, i have a square arse.

Posted by: j c at December 15, 2004 08:05 PM

hey mendel, they already have rectangular chairs! a square is a rectangle!!!!

Posted by: last post for 500 miles at December 18, 2004 11:09 PM

ok look i'm after one of these too, so quit with the shitty comments (no pun intended) and let us know if any supplier you know of sells them

Posted by: another_square_bum at February 13, 2005 07:07 PM

Maybe it was designed for tight enclosures. your leg would get caught on the side closet to the wall if it was round.

Posted by: Bob at March 14, 2005 02:54 PM

yo,philadelphia here i got one and i love it ,the kids wont let me get rid of it,i got the last one in calif or new york

Posted by: michael at April 7, 2005 06:01 PM

yo,philadelphia here i got one and i love it ,the kids wont let me get rid of it,i got the last one in calif or new york

Posted by: michael at April 7, 2005 06:01 PM

hey noname

yes you are right most chairs that we sit in are rectangular BUT they dont have a hole in them. duhhhhhh

Posted by: james at April 24, 2005 09:28 PM

I have one of those and have had it since 1984. It is not uncomfortable and is somewhat of a conversation piece when a guest uses the bathroom. I also have the matching sink. My only problem is I need to replace the seat and can't seem to find the original design. Any suggestion?

Posted by: Liz at May 9, 2005 12:10 AM

Get a 2x4, cut two pieces at the length of the toilet seat and two of the width, glue 'em in a square shape using gorilla glue, wax it up, take the hinges off the old seat(unless broken, in that case glue some door hinges to the toilet.), hinge it to tour toilet. You now have yourself an ersatz toilet seat.

Here's a diagram.

Of course, you can do whatever you want with it.

Posted by: Jello B. at May 25, 2005 06:45 PM

Well, in Canada we call the English speakers Bloc s, so I guess you could sell to them, non?

Posted by: michel laliberte at May 26, 2005 12:30 AM

I am an American with a square toilet seat, like yours. I confess I notice no difference between it and the conventional round or oval seats. The only difference is that it is frequently a topic of dinner conversation, when guests excuse themselves to use the faciilties... and return to comment on the square commode. Rather off-putting.

But more unfortunate is that I now need to replace said toilet seat and cannot find a new one anywhere! What is the name of your London hotel? I may show up to nab the seat cover.


American square-ass

Posted by: Darling Mira at July 16, 2005 02:31 PM

I think it's great infact I had one in the Villa I rented in Italy for the summer, we have to just adapt and have fun

Posted by: Sufyanah at January 24, 2006 10:04 PM

Where can I buy a square toilet. I had one in another house but they stopped making them.

Contact me, I will buy used.

Posted by: ag at February 21, 2006 12:12 PM

Which hotel was it, I work for a building compoany and we are looking for one of these toilets to fit into a clients property.

Posted by: Mazimoo at April 26, 2006 11:23 AM

Ibe sceen that before, its just a toilet that dosent swirl. it would be odd sitting on the square seat though.

Posted by: N/A at May 14, 2006 08:22 PM

Google this:

Eljer Toilet Seat Onyx Model 124-2000-47

Posted by: billc at June 12, 2006 11:54 AM

just go to and search for square toilet seat than another search for Eljer. I found several suppliers with varying prices.

Posted by: Lil at June 15, 2006 11:13 PM


same problem - how did you solve it?

Posted by: kenji kondo at July 5, 2006 01:09 PM

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